“My Raspberries”A piece of artwork in progress.
” The sun will rise and set regardless.
What we choose to do with the light while it’s here is up to us.
~ Alexandra Elle
My raspberries are still producing. Every time I see new fruit on the vine I smile because I notice that I’m surprised – I don’t expect that to be so. But my raspberries don’t need my approval, my logic, my understanding, or my love to live their life according to the timetable that is deeply and eternally connected to their divinity.
They just keep popping out juicy little berries that I pick and eat on my way to my car as I say to myself, “but it has been so cold! Aren’t you supposed to be asleep by now?” etc. On the one hand I love them, am grateful for them, and in awe of their tenacity to be what they were born to be regardless of my opinions and judgments, conscious or unconscious. On the other hand their presence stirs my soul to contemplate how my limiting beliefs about them are a reflection of my limiting beliefs about myself – beliefs that have NOT come from a dialogue with God, but whose seeds are planted by others opinions and judgments that were never meant to take root in my mind.
I am the gardener of my life. I have seeds of divinity planted in me. I feel them. Every morning when I wake I know what to do to nourish them. I’m amazed that they still produce fruit. I’m in awe that I’m more fruitful than I ever thought I could be.
When I stop and listen to the thoughts that don’t resonate with that growth, I am like the gardener who stops expecting the fruit to be hidden beneath the vines. It’s true that there are seasons and physical realities and circumstances in our lives that feed the thoughts that we are past producing. But all I have to do is look at my own experiences to know how harmful it is to let them take root.
I look back on my very productive year and all of the destructive thoughts that would have hindered my progress had I not been aware enough of feeling guided by a light, a spark of something better inside me. My reluctance to start things – unlike my raspberries who are perfectly obedient to their divine nature – is always present. It never gets easier no matter how excited I am to get going on a project or an adventure.
Every day I have to consciously choose to sit down and put pen or chalk to paper if I’m going to have a new piece of artwork to eventually frame and display.
Every time I decide that it’s a day for a Polar Plunge I still have to take that first step into the frigid ocean no matter how rainy or windy it is outside, or miserable I feel.
Every day I have to choose to do the small and monotonous things like laundry, dishes, vacuuming, and reading and praying with my children, hoping that those things are making a difference in the overall atmosphere of my home, feeling that those fruits are the hardest to look for.
Every day I have to choose to be aware that today is a gift not a guarantee. Who I’ll “be” from sun up to sundown is up to me. Responding to the slivers of light that I let into my heart is really the only step that matters until…. “Until” takes care of itself.
My raspberries have taught me to get out of my head and to pay attention to the light that tells me to feed my gifts – to do things that make me feel alive and me in the world – every day, and to pay attention to those people who are fellow gardeners and can collaborate to ensure optimum growth. I will always listen to lessons from nature before opinions of others because nature really does do a perfect job of being magnificent.
You are magnificent. Journey wisely.